Andrea Greer

WHY I'M BOWLING

Strange things are going on inside the offices of the governor, lieutenant governor, and tea party legislators in Texas. Deeply un-good things. Things that do not bode well.

Am I tired of driving back and forth from Houston to Austin to speak up and speak out? A little. But if they think that being a little tired is enough to make me quit, I've got news for them:

They may hold a majority in the legislature right now, but that won't stand. 

They may be threatening to strip funding for cancer screening and HIV prevention from healthcare organizations with long histories of providing those services to low-income Texans who otherwise could not access them, but that won't stand. 

They may think they've backed us into a corner, but, and say it with me now, dude: 

Because of unfair and unnecessary laws, safe and legal abortions can be out of reach of those who don't have the money to pay for them. I don't think that's right, so I'm doing something about it.

The Balls of Power have come together to raise money for Lilith Fund, a nonprofit abortion fund that works with people in Houston and southeast Texas to help them pay for abortions they otherwise could not afford.  

We've come together for one reason, and one reason alone:

If you've sponsored Balls of Power before, you may be worried when I say I'm here for one thing and one thing only:

Don't worry!

I'm still offering my cake incentives. Here's the one and only way you're going to get one of them:

So listen to KP, and let's set this shit up. 

You can donate, any amount, and you will have my sincere gratitude. 

All of these offers include delivery in Houston. I'm not sure shipping works. If you are in Austin, we can probably find someone to drive your cake up to you.

If you donate $150, I will bake for you a chocolate buttermilk cake with vanilla bean frosting OR a yellow cake with fudge frosting OR a big batch of the very best chocolate chip cookies you've ever had with dark chocolate or milk chocolate, your call.

In fact, let's make $150 the cookie level. Chocolate chip, snickerdoodles, or coconut chocolate oatmeal - your cookie call - and best news of all, cookies can be shipped! 

If you donate $200, I will bake for you your choice of a vanilla buttermilk strawberry cake OR the very best carrot cake you have ever eaten. 

For $300, I'll make you a fifteen layer little layer cake, the super-sweet ultra-thin yellow cake drenched in fudge icing.   

For $500, I'll make you BOTH a gingersnap crust pumpkin pie AND a Southern Comfort caramel apple pie for Thanksgiving, and then a chocolate tiramisu buche de noel for Christmas. 

So, don't hesitate. 

I mean, I don't want to brag, but:

You know you want it.

Cake, that is.